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Archive for Leadership

Women in Leadership – Are Old Habits Holding You Back?

It’s rather alarming that we are in the 21^st century and yet there are still so few women in top corporate positions. According to Pew Research, women make up only 5.2% of CEOs in Fortune 500 companies and 5.4% of CEOs in Fortune 1000 companies.

Why is that?

Some of it is the result of inherent challenges that women still face in the workplace – being given equal consideration for leadership opportunities, being paid equally, sexual discrimination and harassment, finding a mentor or champion to guide them in their career, balancing work and home life.

Some of it is perception – many corporate cultures still think of men as the natural choice when it comes to leadership, adopting an attitude of “men take charge, women take care.”

And some of it is that the skills and behaviors that help women early in their careers may be working against them as they strive to advance up the corporate ladder.

World-renowned executive coach Marshall Goldsmith and women’s leadership expert Sally Helgesen took a look at these self-limiting skills and behaviors in their recently-published book, How Women Rise.

Based on their combined 60 years of experience working with leaders all over the world, the authors identified 12 habits that hold women back from getting their next raise, their next promotion or their next job. Although these are not uniquely women’s behaviors, Goldsmith and Helgesen observed that these 12 habits are the most likely to create a barrier for women in getting to where they want to be – in their career or in their life.

One of the first habits the authors talk about is women’s reluctance to point out their achievements. They don’t want to appear to be bragging. And they have a natural tendency to want to share credit with others – “it was a team effort.” Men, on the other hand, are less likely to feel shy about sharing what they’ve accomplished. By not promoting their personal achievements, women often don’t get the recognition (or the opportunities) they deserve.

Another habit they discuss is “The Perfection Trap.” Goldsmith/Helgesen attribute this behavior to the differing messages girls and boys get from their families growing up. Girls are often praised for their precision and for supporting others. Boys are praised for their daring exploits, competitiveness and winning. As children turn into adults, the messages evolve into personal beliefs about success and how to function in society and the workplace.

The good news is, How Women Rise doesn’t just provide insight about the particular habits that may be holding women back. The authors also provide detailed tutoring on how to replace those habits with behaviors that will lead to better results.

Tune in next time when we’ll explore more of the 12 habits and how to turn them around.

The Best Leaders Continue to Learn

It’s easy to get complacent once you’ve reached the top. You’ve worked hard to get there and now you’re ready to guide others as they work toward achieving team and organizational goals. But here’s the thing. Change is constant – challenges, the work environment, people, goals, business needs – and unless you keep learning you will not be prepared to effectively respond to those changes.

So, what are the skills that are important to continue to develop?

If you look at the myriad lists of “top” skills and competencies for leaders (and there are many of them!) there are several skills that consistently bubble to the top: strategic thinking, effective communication, interpersonal skills, a desire to develop others. These are some of the traditional skills that make an effective leader. But there are some additional skills that have become increasingly important over the past few years as we look at a new way of working in the 21^st century. Skills like emotional intelligence, self-awareness, and collaboration.

There was a time when “emotions” did not enter into workplace conversations, at least not in a positive way. Leaders managed actions, not emotions. Today, however, emotional intelligence, or EQ – the ability to recognize and manage your own emotions as well as those of others – is seen as perhaps the most essential skill to succeed as a leader.

One of the elements of emotional intelligence is self-awareness. Leaders who are self-aware, who know their strengths and are willing to admit the areas where they need development, tend to have stronger, more trusting relationships with their teams and colleagues. Self-awareness means understanding your strengths, and also recognizing behaviors that may be working against you. In a previous blog, Your Personal Best Starts with Self-Awareness, I talked about how certain “triggers” in our environment may prevent us from performing at our best. Learning to identify and manage our response to those triggers helps us grow as leaders.

Another element of emotional intelligence is empathy. Although we’re not seeing it demonstrated much on the national stage, empathy has been called THE skill for the 21^st Century.

Empathy is described as “the ability to understand, recognize and appreciate the way others are feeling, even if it is different from what you are feeling.” A more visual description is from the book To Kill A Mockingbird, when Atticus Finch says, “You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view – until you climb into his skin and walk around in it.”

Learning to understand someone else’s point of view – to figure out “where they’re coming from” – has myriad benefits in the workplace and in life in general. It improves interpersonal relationships, teamwork, negotiations, collaboration, sales, customer service, even parenting! And the good news is, as I discussed in a previous blog, Empathy: An Essential Skill for Leaders, empathy can be learned!

Often when we talk about leadership and communication, the focus is on the leader as a provider of information – vision, goals, feedback, updates, solutions – and how frequently and forthrightly that information is provided. But communicating effectively as a leader is more than just giving information. It’s about listening to your employees and conveying that you heard and understood. It’s about ensuring that your tone and body language are in sync with your words.

Leaders who demonstrate to their employees and their teams that they listen – really listen – build trust, promote engagement and inspire loyalty. In a previous blog, Are You Listening? Really Listening? I gave some tips on how to be a better listener.

As I work with leaders in the executive coaching side of my business, my goal is to help them become the best leader they can be. And that always starts from a place of helping them develop self-awareness and promoting continuous learning.

Are you, or is someone in your organization looking to improve their effectiveness as a leader? Contact me for a free consultation to learn about the benefits of coaching.

Get the Best from Your Team – Be an Effective Coach

In my work with leaders over the years, I’ve found that the most effective leaders are those who embrace their role as a coach – to their teams and to their individual employees. These are leaders who listen, who develop and empower their people, and who earn respect through their actions and how they treat others.

Developing your skills as a coach is one of the best ways to grow as a leader.

A great reference tool for this is the book, Trillion Dollar Coach, which profiles Bill Campbell, a football coach turned C-Suite executive who created a third career coaching some of the top CEOs in Silicon Valley. The book is written by Eric Schmidt, Jonathan Rosenberg and Alan Eagle, Google executives who witnessed firsthand “Coach Bill’s” ability to “build trust, foster personal growth, and inspire courage.” The authors interviewed more than 80 people to create a compendium of Bill Campbell stories, insight and wisdom.

Here are 5 key takeaways from Coach Bill’s principles that the authors shared.

Your title makes you a manager, your people make you a leader. Build relationships with your team – show them that you care about them as people. Get to know them. Ask about their lives outside of work, their families. Be generous with your time, connections and other resources.
Respect must be accrued, not demanded. The command and control style of leadership doesn’t work anymore. Treat your employees with respect. Listen to them. Be an evangelist for courage by believing in people more than they believe in themselves. Don’t tell them what to do – offer stories and help guide them to the best decisions for them.
Honesty is key. Practice complete candor. Pair negative feedback with caring. And give feedback as soon as possible. If it’s negative feedback, deliver it privately. Feedback is necessary for growth, and your responsibility as a leader and coach is to help your people grow.
Pick the right players. Look for those who have the ability to learn fast and are willing to work hard. Choose people with integrity, grit, empathy and a team-first attitude.
Create a decision-making process that ensures all perspectives and points of view are heard. Look for the best idea, not necessarily consensus. If necessary, break a tie and make the decision.

Stay tuned for future blogs when we’ll talk about more ways you can grow as a leader.

Managers Increasingly Held to a Higher Standard

As I discussed in my last blog, recent legislation establishes that managers can now be held personally liable for not following the law, even if they do so unintentionally. Two key areas where this has played out in court are hostile work environments and wage and hour violations.

Managers are being held to a much higher standard.

This means that business owners and senior leaders must be sure they understand and follow the laws, and they must also ensure that their managers and supervisors understand and follow the laws. Some ways to accomplish this are through management training, effective communication, and/or one-on-one coaching.

In the wake of the #MeToo Movement and other workplace harassment situations, the threshold for acceptable behavior has been revised. In the past, plaintiffs had to show a pattern of behavior for a workplace to be deemed a hostile work environment. Today it can be considered as such based on one or two incidents. “But we’ve always had an informal, joking environment,” is not an acceptable excuse.

Managers need to pay attention to behaviors that may be offensive to some and stop them before they become part of the culture. If not, they could be held personally liable for creating a hostile environment. Encourage managers to periodically gauge team interactions and speak with individuals to proactively identify any issues and to promote a positive culture.

Also, senior leadership and all managers and supervisors should model the appropriate behavior they expect from others.

In the past it was very rare for a manager to be named in a wage and hour dispute. Not so today. California’s Labor Code 558.1 states that “a company’s owners, directors, officers and even managing agents can be held personally liable for wage and hour violations.” It’s not enough to say that not following the law was unintentional, or a mere oversight.

If you need help ensuring that you are legally compliant, or in coaching managers around any of these issues, please contact me at michelle@connecttohr.com.

A Coach Can Help You Take the Next Step in Your Career

Advancing in your career doesn’t have to mean finding a new job in a different company. Often there are opportunities to grow right within your own organization. And companies who provide those opportunities are more likely to engage and retain their top performers. One of the challenges that organizations face, however, is creating a clear path for employees to traverse toward that next step in their career.

Whether you are an organization looking to retain top performers, or an individual wanting to move up within your organization or at another company, a good career coach can help you meet your goal.

Here are some ways a good career coach can help.

Provide clarity. Before you even begin to look for your next opportunity, you need to gain clarity around your target. What do you really want to do? What do you definitely NOT want to do? A coach can help you filter through your skills and experience and map them toward opportunities that have the potential to be fulfilling next steps in your career versus “just a job.”

Help you strategize. A good career coach will identify the skills and behaviors you need to move up within the organization, and help you create a plan to develop those skills and behaviors. They also know what works and doesn’t work in the job search process. So if you’re looking for a new job they can offer real world insight and ideas. Either way, they will help you put together a targeted, effective plan that will get you in front of the right people for the right opportunity.

Polish your pitch. A targeted, concise, compelling resume is your first opportunity to impress a hiring manager and differentiate yourself from other job seekers. Whether you are moving up within your organization or moving on, you should always have an up-to-date resume. A good coach will help you create a resume that gets results.

Keep you accountable. A good coach will keep you on track, encouraging you to make the regular small steps that will lead to the big result. They will celebrate your successes with you, and help you keep going when things don’t go as planned. They’ll help you tweak your strategy as necessary to achieve your goals.

Provide support. Your coach is there to help you succeed. They can be a sounding board if you get discouraged. They can connect you to resources within their network. Many will do mock interviews with you to help you prepare. They can give you objective feedback on your plan, your pitch and your approach.

Are you an organization looking to retain your top performers? Or an individual ready to take the next step in your career but don’t know how to get started? Do you know someone who is looking for a job but getting little or no results? I have worked with many senior leaders to help them develop and successfully implement an effective plan to get “unstuck” and take that all-important next step. Contact me at michelle@connecttohr.com

Most Popular 2018 Topic for Connect to HR: Leadership

It’s hard to believe that another year is coming to an end. This has been a very busy and exciting year for Connect to HR. As I announced a few months ago, I’ve added a new service – Executive Adviser and Coach. It’s a role that I’ve already been performing for many of the senior executives and leaders I’ve worked with, and now I’ve made it official!

My typical clients are not new executives. They are well established in their careers – CEOs, Presidents of small to mid-size companies, and Managing Directors, Senior Directors, VPs, and Executive Directors of nonprofits. They’re facing challenges such as:

Effective communication – What they can say or not say, what they can do or not do – and they’re feeling unsettled, possibly for the first time in their career (and thus can benefit from an external adviser)
Being assigned a role that’s not what they’ve done before – with little to no mentorship
A restructuring that leaves them with more responsibilities than ever, without much guidance or room for error

I’m excited about adding this new offering to my list of HR consulting services and I look forward to working with leaders to help them navigate challenges and reach their full potential.

As I’ve been looking back over my blogs this year it’s clear that leadership has been a very popular topic. In case you missed them, here are a few of Connect to HR’s most popular blogs in 2018.

5 Key Characteristics of an Effective Leader
In the work I’ve done with leaders over the years in both corporate roles and as a consultant, I’ve identified five common characteristics among those whom I consider to be effective leaders. That is, whose employees are engaged and loyal, whose teams are high-functioning, and whose organizations are thriving. Read more

Successful Leaders Listen More, Talk Less
Successful business leaders know that to engage employees, meet customer needs, and stay ahead in the marketplace, they need to listen more than they talk. Read more

Top 3 Reasons to Hire an Executive Coach
There was a time when leadership coaching was reserved for those leaders who needed to “shape up” in a particular area before being shown the door. That’s not the case today. In fact, most senior leaders attribute at least part of their success to having worked with an effective executive coach. Read more

Empathy: An Essential Skill for Leaders
Empathy has been called THE skill for the 21^st century. Learning to understand others’ point of view – to figure out “where they’re coming from” – has myriad benefits in the workplace and in life in general. It improves interpersonal relationships, teamwork, negotiations, collaboration, sales, customer service, even parenting! Read more

Do you or another leader in your organization need help navigating challenges or developing in a specific leadership area? I can help! Please contact me at michelle@connecttohr to set up a free consultation.

Use It or Lose It

Still have dollars left to spend in your Human Resources budget this year? This is the perfect time to invest those dollars in the needs or challenges that are still on your TO DO list.

Do you need help with…

An experienced executive who is struggling as a leader and needs coaching and guidance?
A recently-promoted manager who needs support and guidance as they transition
to leadership?
Someone new to HR who needs to be quickly brought up to speed?
That innovative, highly impactful HR program you haven’t had time to implement?

Whatever the challenge, Connect to HR is here to help! We’ve achieved outstanding results for companies facing these same situations.

Contact Michelle at michelle@connecttohr.com TODAY to schedule a FREE consultation.

What Our Clients Are Saying About Connect to HR

“Michelle’s approach, ideas and fostering of my own insights pushed me forward as a boss, helped our organization and was quite meaningful to me.” – Jake L., CEO of Intact U.S.

“Michelle is a leadership development professional who looks at the total organization, the individuals and the current dynamics to align the best possible scenarios for the Executive, and for the vision of the governing board.” – Lisa C., Former Executive Director, SCA

“Before we started working with Michelle, we had looked at HR platforms, but Michelle was a live person with experience and knowledge, who could share examples with us, versus us interacting with a computer screen. She’s a great sounding board as different situations come up. Thanks to Michelle, I’ve gained confidence in what I’m doing and how I handle situations. I also know that as new issues come up I can reach out to her for advice. She’s accessible and easy to work with.” – Marci H., HR Manager of IDW Publishing

“As a trained chef and business owner with no HR experience, I had to learn HR on the job. Michelle was a great teacher in that she walked me through things step by step. She was thorough and comprehensive, yet kept it simple: here’s your issue, here are some scenarios, here are the rules. She didn’t throw a lot of legal language at me.” – Lourine W., Owner (Left Coast Catering)

A Culture of Empathy Starts at the Top

Research shows that companies who demonstrate they care – about their employees, about their customers, about their community – significantly outperform their less-caring peers. People want to work there. Customers want to buy there. And they all want to tell their friends.

So what’s the magic formula? Building personal connections and developing strong and enduring relationships. When leaders connect with their employees by showing empathy, listening to them, recognizing the value they provide to the organization, and providing growth opportunities, those employees are more likely to care about their work, their customers and the business.

One example of a company that understands the importance of building connections is Zappos. They provide 24/7 customer service – by phone. Zappos encourages phone calls because they enable in-depth conversations with customers and a better opportunity to create personal connections. A June 2017 Forbes article described Zappos’ model this way: “When that one call comes in, Zappos will do anything to make sure it’s an engaging and personable experience for the customer, in the hope that a single great phone interaction will serve as a proxy in the customer’s mind for the overall personality of this company.”

Making personal connections and building relationships have traditionally been relegated to the “soft” side of business skills. But as described in a recent article in Chief Learning Officer Magazine, there’s “hard” science evidence indicating that “our brains are wired to be social” and that we can leverage that information to learn how to create personal connections and build lasting relationships.

According to the article, KPMG partnered with the head of the Wharton Neuroscience Initiative at the University of Pennsylvania to evaluate the strength of their relationships with clients and within the organization. One of the outcomes was “an instructional program on applying practical insights from neuroscience to build trusted relationships.”

Some of those insights were:

Initiating a relationship. The brain seeks social cues – “the real-time behaviors that display connection.” When you first meet someone, make eye contact. Smile, and pay close attention to them. Listen. “Failing to look and listen reduces information flow into the social brain, limiting the potential for building connections, establishing trust and working together.”

Engaging emotionally. Don’t jump into a business conversation. Engage in a conversation to get to know the other person better. Adapt your communication style to theirs – for example, if they’re soft spoken and you tend to be loud, lower you voice. Build rapport by finding things in common.

Engaging cognitively. This is where empathy plays a big part. Ask about and listen to their perspective. Try to see things from their vantage point. “Activating perspective-taking engages the social brain, which enhances your ability to develop understanding, and helps to achieve common goals.”

A culture that fosters strong, trusting relationships – both internally and externally – begins at the top.

As the old adage says, “If you take care of your people, your people will take care of the business.”

Empathy: An Essential Skill for Leaders

Over the past few months I’ve been talking about the skills required to be an effective leader. So far I’ve talked about listening, self-awareness and conversational intelligence. Another skill that is being increasingly recognized as an essential leadership skill is empathy. Although we’re not seeing it demonstrated much on the national stage, empathy has been called THE skill for the 21^st Century.

A recent Forbes article describes empathy as “the ability to understand, recognize and appreciate the way others are feeling, even if it is different from what you are feeling.” A more visual description is from the book To Kill A Mockingbird, when Atticus Finch says, “You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view – until you climb into his skin and walk around in it.”

Learning to understand others’ point of view – to figure out “where they’re coming from” – has myriad benefits in the workplace and in life in general. It improves interpersonal relationships, teamwork, negotiations, collaboration, sales, customer service, even parenting!

And empathy (which is one of the components of emotional intelligence) can be learned, according to a study conducted by Cambridge University. In the largest study ever conducted to determine whether the ability to show empathy is based on genetics, results showed that the ability to do so is only 10% genetic. So…90% of the time empathy can be learned.

It requires practice. So how do you do it? International Executive Coach Dr. Melinda Fouts has developed an Empathy Self Audit to help “assess your empathy and do some self-reflection.” Here are a few of the questions in her self-audit:

Are you aware of how others are feeling? Or are you oblivious?
Do you try to avoid hurting the feelings of others?
Do you respect the way others feel, or do you put them down or tease them?
Do you care about the feelings of others?
Does the display of strong emotions bother you, or do you understand and appreciate what they are experiencing?
Are there times you are not sensitive to someone’s feelings? If so, why?
Can you reflect back what you heard the person saying using the same adjectives that the person used to express their emotions?

Spend some time thinking about these questions. What stands out to you? Do your mounting responsibilities, deadlines, or stress get in the way of your being sensitive toward others’ thoughts and feelings? If so, take a step back and think about how you can practice empathy. As a leader in the 21^st Century, it’s a key gateway to your personal and career success.

Next time I’ll share some examples of how integrating empathy into the culture leads to organizational success.

Building Trust Through “Conversational Intelligence”

As leaders, we each have multiple conversations throughout our day. A one-on-one with an employee. A strategy meeting with our team. A performance issue discussion with HR. A budget update with our own leader. And so on.

We typically enter these conversations with a preset notion of how they’ll turn out. Or how we want them to turn out. Yet how often does that preset notion – assumption – go out the window once the conversation gets underway? What we wanted or expected – our intention – does not match the other person’s intention and communication breaks down.

How does that happen?

In her book, Conversational Intelligence, Judith E. Glaser, organizational anthropologist and Founder and CEO of CreatingWE, explains it:

“Breakdowns happen when you and I think we are talking to each other, but we are really talking past each other. We are so engrossed in what we have to say that we don’t realize we are carrying on our own monologues, not dialogues. When we are conversationally blind, our conversations often go off track because we see the world from our own perspective and not from the other person’s.”

One of the most important steps in becoming an effective leader is to develop trusting relationships – with your individual employees, with your team, with your peers, and with your own leadership. Developing that trust comes partly from your actions – doing what you say you’re going to do – and partly from how you communicate with others, or as Glaser calls it, your “Conversational Intelligence.”

“Conversations are multidimensional, not linear,” Glaser says. “What we think, what we say, what we mean, what others hear, and how we feel about it afterward are the key dimensions behind Conversational Intelligence. Though conversations are not simply “ask and tell” levels of discourse, we often treat them as though they are.”

Conversational Intelligence is an organization’s ability to communicate in ways that create a shared concept of reality. “It’s about closing the gaps between your reality and mine. As such, it can yield improved business results and create a framework for enhancing relationships and partnerships, releasing new energy for growth and transformation.”

So how do we develop and improve our Conversational Intelligence?

Glaser says that the first step is creating a healthy, trusting environment. “When intentions are set on bridging our realities, being open and transparent, focusing on respect and relationships before tasks, listening to understand, discovering shared success and consistently working to narrow the reality gaps, we are exercising our conversational muscles. When we do that, we are much more likely to achieve organizational goals and perhaps our personal ones as well.”

“The single biggest problem with communication is the illusion that it has taken place.” – George Bernard Shaw